Happy with being me.

As I'm now in my 28th year of life I have learned so much about myself and I have grown so much. I no longer try to compare myself to other females like I used to do all the time. I was always worried about what a others thought about me, were they thinking negative things, because that is what i thought about myself. but why Lace ? I don't know why I let that consume me for so many years.

It is crazy to me that I am now 148.2 (Yay haha i haven't been under 150 from more than 1 day in over 2 years) and I am happier about my body then I have ever been. Not to confuse that with my body being where it should be, because I am not where I want to be physically.  However mentally my self imagine is better then it has ever been.
I am doing everything in my power to be more fit, to be active, to get stronger and I am putting more good things into my body than bad. Which all those things make me happy inside and out.

It blows my mind,  looking back at pictures that I took when I first moved to New Mexico to be with my husband when I was 17 and  125 pounds and thought i wasn't skinny enough.  bonkers! why is it instilled in some of us that we aren't ever good enough?!

Now 11 years later I have an scar from above my belly button down to my pelvic region,  I have stretch marks on my stomach, sides, thighs, arms, calves, butt, everywhere. I was so depressed and self conscious about them some days, and then others I was fine with them because my body held a little human being for 10 months and my scar is a reminder i have beaten cancer. It was always a toss up on what I would feel every new day that came. Now I don't look down on them or try to pick them apart anymore because I can't change the fact that those are there.  And I know my body is beautiful to me who cares what others think of it. :D I am the one living in my skin!

I see people all around me always criticizing other peoples bodies for every little thing you can imagine, instead of seeing the beauty in them. I know it is also stemming from their own personal self esteem issues because that is what i did for so long. Or there are those people who will always think they are better than. no matter what. (I just pray for those ones).
But I look at that big person running down the street and that is motivation to me get out and go for a walk. Or I see other Moms getting out and getting fit and that encourages me. People who lost a limb or was born without, lifting weights or are super fit that motivates me. People who look down upon or critique every little thing about a person that just makes me sad for that person. smh

Stop worrying about others and fix yourself.

I just hope people understand it is ok to have a few extra pounds or have a couple stretch marks on your body. We are all human, some of us get them and some don't. Some of us have a little more fluff because we like sweets a tad too much and some can eat sweets for days and remain skinny minnie. We are all different and unique in our own way.

However i am not condoning bad health habits. I believe every person should get up, get out and be active. Do something that gets your heart rate up. Its what the body is made for. Enjoy life. Stop letting days go by being miserable with negative thoughts.

My point is I am happy with the person I have become. I am excited to see more changes I look forward to the future now I'm not scared of it.  No matter what if I fail to do good one day i will continuously pick myself back up and push forward the next day. I am only in competition with myself. I am not trying to be no one else, and It is okay to be different then everyone else. go out and be a unicorn Lace! haha
Good night.

Things running through my mind!

I wish I could lose this weight

I go to the gym to get fit and lose the extra pounds

nothing comes off

Yes I know I'm 25 pounds overweight

it sucks 

This weight doesn't define me

Weight isn't everything

Wish people would get that through their heads. 

At least I'm trying. 

One step at a time 

I am beautiful  

I eat candy 

It's my weakness

Can't change overnight 

It takes time

Need more support 

I am good enough 

Life is tough 

Wish I could go away and find myself

Back up give me 50 feet

People mistake my kindness for weakness 

Yes I am a Christian.

I am not perfect!

We are all human.
strongly dislike being lied too.

I am happy to be oblivious at times.

Hate when my blood boils 

I don't like being this kind of person
dishonest people are lame.
grow up.

Rather be a loner than have judgemental people in my life 

Who has time for that

All love no hate 

If only that could really happen in this day and age. 

Judgemental people suck. 

You don't know my story.

I'm a listener not a talker

Everyday battles. 

Sometimes wish someone would listen. 

Being a better me one day at a time.

I am not who I was yesterday, nor last week or a month ago when i was wanting to just run away from life, get a divorce and leave. Life is freaking tough and it hurts sometimes. I forget no one knows how I feel inside or what is going on with 'me', everyone assume things are fine as the days go by so fast and we don't talk for days and months. If all that is spoken when we talk is "I'm good. I'm fine" how is anyone to ever know?

Being alone, away from family during holidays doesn't get easier as the years go by, especially as Alana is growing up, I long for the day we can be with family during every holiday.

I am a better me today. I am getting stronger again. The past 4 day i feel myself smiling more than frowning, I'm singing again, taking pictures again, i am slowing getting back to myself. I am opening up more trying not keeping things in or bottling them up.
How is my husband going to know what I want to be done to better our marriage if I don't tell him and same goes for him. lol I mean come on people we have to stop assuming we know what each other want and need.

Not everyone is religious or believes in the same things I do and thats fine with me, everyone has their own thing. But for me God is my comfort. I didn't go to church for a month and it has really taken a toll on me. I have been slacking big time in Him and in that department and I know this is the reason for why I have been feeling this way. I am a sinner I struggle with my demons daily and sometimes they get the best of me, but I am through. I refuse to surrender to the negativity that goes on in my head. I am a warrior, I am a survivor! I am the only one that has the power make myself better.

I am not saying this for attention.. I am saying it because people have to stop and think. This generation is getting so used to just throwing in the towel putting our hands up and saying I'm done, I quit! when there is so much to fight for. Not only in Marriages but in EVERYTHING in your life.
If we change for the better...if we believe in ourselves if we put the past behind us. I believe everyone can change for the better, IF you believe in yourself! Give your self the benefit of the doubt! Stop letting the past eat you alive. Take the next step for a better future. Love yourself, better yourself.

I am writing this because I know I am not alone on this or in this thing called life. Neither are you who read this. I know most people stopped reading this when I started talking about God but if you read this through please stop judging a book by the cover because you don't know what's inside unless you read it. I'm talking about me and everyone else, don't judge me from my outside you only see what I or anyone let you see. Unless, we speak about what's really inside.
Stop thinking you know someone's marriage, you don't know what happens behind closed doors, you don't know the struggles each person is going through. I know people pick and choose different things when they read and take it out of context, just know it takes a lot to open up!
I have a voice, and know it will only be heard if I speak. -Lacey

free crochet toddler beanie/hat

Crochet Hat 3 years old
double crochet
hook H/8 5.00mm
3 years
6 inches brim 15cm
7 inches top to bottom.

START with magic Circle
chain 2
1. 12 DC join at top of 1st DC (12)
2. 2 DC in each DC (24)
3. 2 DC 1 DC in next ~repeat (36)
4. 2 DC 1 DC in next 2 ~repeat (48)
5. 2 DC 1 DC in next 3 (60)
6-13. 1 DC in each DC (60)
14. 1 hdd around (60)

I have been crochet hats consistently since December 2012.
However I learned from my Grandmother at 12-13 years old.
It is a passion. I Have used so many other peoples free patterns but i have always forgot or couldnt get the measurements right so i made what fits for this age :D

Rapidlash

Does it work or doesn't it. Many people want to know. So lets tell you my experience and why I choose to finally buy this product.

April 20th 2013 i had permanent lashes extension put on. I absolutely loved them for a couple weeks until i got a stye on my right eye (which hurt like heck) and i had to remove them. Well as i removed them with baby oil and MAC oil based makeup remover pretty much all my existing lashes went with the fake ones. It was terrible. i liked my lashes before i ever did that, they were normal length and any waterproof mascara left them curled and pretty. So of course i was terrified when i no longer had but a few lashes on each eyelid. So...I learned all about temporary false lashes that i glued on my self. I got pretty awesome at it and wore them everyday for months til the end of July. My husband came home from deployment and i was dolled up everyday for him for a few weeks but i didn't have much time to apply false lashes when we just wanted to go out spur of the moment so i decided i needed to do something.

I ordered Rapid lash from Amazon and got my package a week later and started applying it that night. I used it every night for 4 weeks straight and i was shocked at how quick my results came. i had stubble's all on my lash line after 2 weeks and by week 4 i had lashes just as long as my lashes were prior to having the extensions put on. It was amazing, however they are stick straight no curl at all. Just like my lashes before were, it dont discourage me one bit. I started using Rapid lash every other night because being a glasses wearer every time i blinked my lashes would brush my lenses (hehe) which did tickle me because i thought my lashes were ruined forever lol.

I haven't used the product for about a week, but i just got my contact prescription so of course i started back up tonight. :D I can not wait to see how much longer they can get with the rest of the tube.

So if you ask me "Should i buy it?" i say "heck yeah". It is defiantly worth the money. Lashes are very important and why not invest in Rapid lash? If you are willing to buy mascara you should be willing to buy this. just saying :D I will post pictures of my lashes As they are now and the after when the tube is finished.

It has been awhile.....

I havent written on my blog since 2010 which is crazy to me. I feel like it was a month ago or something. I didnt write many post back then either but anywhoozle, I will be doing reviews again I have tons of products I have tried out in the past few years that I love & hate.

The Falsies Mascara. maybelline

my thoughts on this mascara that everybody is raving about. :)
i have been using this mascara for only a week but so far i DO NOT like it.
i maybe the only person not liking it at the moment, or maybe its because i have only been using it for a week but i well continue using it for the rest of the month and see how it goes.
I curl my lashes before i put mascara on them. when applying this mascara my lashes fall straight down, i think the formula weighs them down alot. i let them dry for over 10 minutes and then curl them again and every time i look in the mirror not even 20 mins later they are sticking straight forward again. i am not sure if they have a waterproof version yet but if they do maybe that formulation would hold a curl better for my lashes.
As for the wand it is unique and i kind of do like the shape of it it coats the lashes really well and when held flat its great for getting the lower lashes.